Application to Offer

Someone, someday said, “Don’t count the moments in life; count the life in every moment”. Now, it doesn’t make much sense, or rather any sense, but it just sounds good in your brain. I don’t know what it means and I never tried to ponder over the philosophy behind it but I do believe that there are some moments, or rather phases, in life which one can never forget. One such phase in an engineer’s life is when he is hunting for jobs. Now, this hunting isn’t as exciting and adventurous as hunting in the woods, the effort and energy invested, however, are comparable.

It was around Christmas, it was the coldest day of the year. Daryl and Kabir were both exhausted from the brainstorming that they had been through the entire day. They had come for an interview at CSS Technologies. They had applied for a job there, sometime in August and had lost all hopes of getting a call. And that is exactly when software companies call freshers.

Until today, for Daryl and Kabir, an interview in a software company meant nothing more than a torture for few hours and then listening to those intimidating words: “The HR will get back to you”. These words didn’t become any less annoying in spite of the fact that they came from the most gorgeous women in the HR department of the company, who somehow managed to maintain an extraordinarily, magically, beautiful and pleasing smile. With this kind of a smile, even if she informed about a second 9/11 incident, some of us would be too hypnotized to even frown. However, jobless software engineers are a rare breed. For them, those seven words are as heart-breaking as they can be. Every time, the goddess’ statements actually meant that “you are an idiot and don’t deserve to be here” but sounded like genuine regret from the company for not having enough openings at that time for people with their kind of skills.

This day, however, was different. Today, Daryl and Kabir were able to solve life’s most genuinely senseless problems like calculating the time required for a train to reach point B from point A, when the wind is blowing at 40 mph. Or, calculating the percentage of loss suffered by a lady selling marbles, when she was betrayed by her business partner by selling 76% of the marbles at 85% less than the actual price to two of her friends, who shared the number of marbles at 39% and 61% each. And all this and much more they managed to do within the stipulated time of 90 minutes. To summarize, they managed to get through the written test at CSS, which is inappropriately called an aptitude test. However, it was not yet time to keep the pens down, as another written test, again inappropriately called the technical test, was to follow. Lady luck smiled at them again as they managed to answer sufficient number of questions right to get a seat on the couch where only those who passed were asked to sit, while the rest were being explained the genuine regret by the gorgeous lady.
As Daryl and Kabir waited patiently for a project manager to come and interview them, they constantly wiped droplets from over their forehead and stared at their watches to kill time. Of course, the thought of what would the manager ask and how they would answer it was not out of their minds and no matter how much they tried to stay cool, their minds wandered into the pages of java books that they had been reading day and night. They probably knew anything and everything that the manager might even think of asking, or even more, but were still afraid that it would not require much for their nervousness to take over their knowledge and that they would screw up this time as well. Two hours passed and there were no signs of anybody coming to take them to the meeting room for the torture. It was not the first time for Daryl and Kabir but the agony was not any less than the first time. In fact, Daryl could not control his agony from taking over his mighty nervousness and he murmured, “What the hell?” Kabir, who was next to him, looked at him instantly, as if he was awakened from a partial sleep, but wanted to pretend that he was totally awake and fresh. Daryl’s words brought him out of his day dream, where he was picturing himself working smartly with the other less smart people of this organization and his natural charm and wit impressed his female colleagues. Believe it or not, this is the dream of every software engineer guy. (And they all wonder, with me, what the lady engineer’s dream is). Daryl continued, “Are we slaves??? Or prisoners waiting patiently for getting their daily bread?” Kabir smiled, trying to calm Daryl down. He said, “It’s the same everywhere. But I am sure this would be the last time.” Kabir’s words did calm Daryl down and he put his hands forward for a handshake and introduced himself with a smile. Smiles really are infectious. “Daryl”, he said in a low, however, confident tone; probably practicing for his interview. The other end replied, “Kabir Sharma” in a rather trembling voice.
Kabir: “I am here for the java position.”
Daryl: “Me too. Do you wanna get some coffee?”
Kabir: “Now? What if the manager comes and…”
Daryl (interrupting Kabir): “Screw them. We have been waiting for two hours. They are in need of us as much as much as we are of them. May be a little less, but still…”
Kabir: “Ok… Ok… Don’t yell… I don’t want to lose the job before even getting it.”
Daryl: “Yeah. Me neither. But if I don’t get a coffee right now, I don’t think I will be able to handle the interview well. Need to get refreshed.”
Kabir: “You are right. Let’s find the machine”
Daryl and Kabir both rose from their seats, where they had been sticking patiently for two hours now. Kabir just looked back at the seat to see his ass-print. They moved to the right corner of the huge floor, where a coffee vending machine was installed. On their way, both were looking around checking out the crowd. Both commented on a few hot females to each other and envied the apparently ugly lot that was with those beauties.

The ten minutes that followed, which they spent at the coffee machine, were enough for them to realize that they had surprisingly similar interests and that they had been through similar troubles in the recent past, being away from home and hunting for a job to survive. This is where a friendship was born, which looked like it would last as long as the lifetime of the friends and even after it. (I don’t know how it works, but people say it can).

As they were returning from the farther end of the floor, they saw a hefty, tall, fair, partly bald guy hovering around the place where they were seated, looking for somebody. Both of them stared at him for a few milli-seconds, then at each other for a few micro-seconds and then it was as if lightening struck both of them. Never tried lip-reading or face reading and yet they could read and interpret the body language of the person from a distance of about 50 metres. They realized that he was the manager who was to interview them and he was, in fact, looking for them. Both of them walked as fast as they could, only because running across the floor would seem weird and awkward and would invite embarrassment. As they reached their place, Daryl said, trying to take control of his breath and the situation, “Hello, Sir. I am Daryl. You are probably looking for us.” As fast as they had walked, Kabir’s heart was beating a million beats. The manager turned around and said, searching for a name in the paper that he had in his hand, “Hmm… and where’s the other person? Umm, what was his name?”. “Sir, it’s probably me. Kabir Sharma.”, Kabir said, trying to stop his heart from exploding out of his chest. The manager acknowledged, “Right. I was looking for you guys.” Kabir began again “Sir, actually, we were just… actually, we just went for… actually, it had been…”. Daryl, realizing that Kabir was unnecessarily trying to justify the need of a coffee break, tried to stop him by holding his hand. Guys holding hands this way is a rare sight and would be declared obscene if they were elsewhere and the situation was different. To Daryl and Kabir’s fortune, the manager interrupted Kabir’s thrice or four times half-constructed sentence, always beginning with “actually”, and asked Kabir to follow him into meeting room Chicago, while he asked Daryl to wait there. I am not sure of the idea of naming meeting rooms after cities. The first time I went for an interview, the HR person told me, “Mr. Kamat, the person who will be interviewing you, is in New York. Please go there. It is to your right.” I wondered - I might be facing south but is that enough direction to get to New York? My next question to that HR person will not be written here to retain the reader’s respect for the author.

A few hours later, both Daryl and Kabir were happily accepting the offer letter from the gorgeous woman, or may be she appeared gorgeous to them because her hands signed their offer letters. Bearing happiness, joy, satisfaction, gratefulness and relief all at the same time on their faces, both of them walked out from the building, passing the reception where a few other aspiring and nervous candidates were still awaiting some manager. What was running through their minds was written on their faces - Did these two gentlemen eat up two vacancies? or the smiles are meant to hide the disappointment from others? Both of them, however, didn’t care to look at the others and their smiles transformed into laughter as they reached the visitor’s parking where Daryl’s bike was parked.

They celebrated one of their greatest achievements in life over a cup of tea and cream-rolls. Daryl, then, dropped Kabir home and waved him good-bye. Good-byes always mark the end of one journey and the beginning of another. Thus, the journey from “application” to “offer” finally ended for the two only making way for bigger ones to begin.